lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
