i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
