so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
