i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
