I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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