Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Im just a social blackout drinker.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
