Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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