Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
