They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize
