Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
