Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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