I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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