Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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