At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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