whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
