i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
You're a waste of cheezeits
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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