in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Randomize
