i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
