no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
