Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
