I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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