OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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