You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm jealous of your bromance
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
