I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
This baby is an asshole
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
