your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
