How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
