Buhtt sex?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
