he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
my nose is crying tears of wow.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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