We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
