White coat. Heels.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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