Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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