i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
