Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Randomize
