i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
