I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
We need to feng shui this bitch.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
