would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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