you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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