i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
