is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Enjoy the penises
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
