Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
