In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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