everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
