I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I met the friendliest cop last night
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
