I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
