she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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