Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
