So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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