I think im going to throw up on grandma
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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