pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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