What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
